Holding On

March 26, 2014  •  Leave a Comment

 

I’ve started this blog to find a quiet space for myself on the web. A place to think really. A place where I don’t really care if anyone’s listening or viewing. A place to be alone with my thoughts. A place just to be me. There are plenty of other places on the web where people can find me engaging with others socially, but none really—except here—where I am actually saying anything of significance. I’d like to be someplace on the web where I don’t have to censor myself or dumb down what I’m saying. When you have a PhD it is difficult to find people who understand your references and who can truly understand what you’re saying. But if I’m talking to myself, then I no longer have to worry about being misunderstood, right?

More importantly, I started this blog to contemplate the beauty I see all around me and in some sense to reflect upon that beauty. Why take pictures? Why now? Why these subjects? What does it all mean—to me. Not to my fans, followers, and advocates across the web, but me. Little old me. Lots of people take photographs, but not many are as passionate as I am about it. I can spend hours just getting lost in photography and creating art. I turn on music and begin to create and time both stands still and speeds up. I am in a perfect state. A state where I can’t think, just exist. A state where all my problems melt away, and I am singularly captivated and challenged with each new photo or visual artwork. This is what I call “flow.”  Very few people ever experience flow, and I think it’s a gift only true artists are given.  

I’ve also wanted to start a blog where I could feel free to post photographs of my children because in so many ways they are growing up, and I’m documenting that through my photography. I’d like to provide a living, breathing record of what their journey to toddlerhood, childhood and beyond looks like. At the same time I am also fully aware that these little people are important to me, but not really important to others.  So here I can feel assured that I won’t be annoying anyone by posting these photos. No one will be visiting right? However, it’s my goal to only post photographs of them that I would actually like if I weren’t their mother. That’s my goal; we will see if I succeed. Photographing really little people is exceedingly difficult. Getting even one of them to sit still for even a second or to get them to sit together is almost impossible. And once they are still, they are usually crying :P So this will be a challenge for me.  I can only hope that I will improve over time and in this respect this blog will help me to document my progress as a photographer.

yawn...I’m getting sleepy.

(Oh yeah, why this photo for my inaugural post? Not sure really. It’s obviously metaphorical. There are these two seeds together teetering on the edge of a dandelion stem. They shouldn’t be there. They shouldn’t even exist, let alone exist together. Yet they are breaking all the rules. All the known rules of physics and of logic and common sense. They are teetering on the brink of disaster, but they hold on. Lighter than air, by holding on to each other they stay rooted to what is important. And in holding on to each other they are invincible.)

 


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